Its just another sad day here. Not quite sure why this time, but it is. Actually, I guess there could be a number of reasons why. Well, I there are. Just so many emotions going around. I hate not being able to control them, even with the help of my trusty little blue pill. Although, I know it helps a ton.
Its almost been a year. 1 whole year since my life was uprooted once again. 1 whole year since my heart was taken out of my chest and stomped on. A whole year. I had so many plans for this year. So many hopes and dreams and here it is a year later. Nothing. I have a house full of kids. But not the kind I have longed for. Not the ones I have been hoping and wishing for, ones thats need me. Not the ones that I have wanted for 4 and a half long years.
I have been doing good. Ive been strong. Or, I thought I had anyway. I just feel myself crumbling again. Starting to relive all the emotions from those long two weeks. Remembering the last time I felt somewhat alive and just not going through the emotions. Maybe, I will feel that way again. Maybe.
